


Nobody's Fault But Mine

by peanutbutterjelly-pie (Aleakim)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Bakery, First Kiss, Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Minor Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester, Mistaken Identity, Misunderstandings, Pining, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2019-03-06 22:34:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13421031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aleakim/pseuds/peanutbutterjelly-pie
Summary: -Castiel just should have listened.Heseriouslyshould have.But instead he found himself hypnotized by those beautiful green eyes and he totally missed the most important thing in the process.-





	Nobody's Fault But Mine

**Author's Note:**

> -
> 
> Title inspired by Led Zeppelin's "Nobody's Fault But Mine"
> 
>  
> 
> This draft had been in my folder for _ages_ now and it drove me a bit crazy more often than now!! I started the whole thing, then I deleted everything, began the story anew, deleted it once again, and so on and on ...  
>  But NOW I finally got the hang of it somehow (please don't ask me how I managed that ^^') and I actually like the end product just fine :))
> 
> I hope you'll have fun!!

It's on a cloudy Thursday morning when Castiel realizes that he got himself a serious crush on one of his regular patrons.

The whole thing was completely unplanned, of course. Castiel has about a thousand other things on his mind, with him opening his new bakery in a popular part of the town, being all proud and self-assured after having managed to survive the long months of bank issues and renovations that took way longer than expected, feeling all confident and happy when the first reactions on the opening day turned out be quite positive and people came back the next morning to get themselves a new fix.

It's been a very stressful few months and he's actually got no time for an obnoxious infatuation.

But since the day the green-eyed man walked through the door for the very first time Castiel's interest was piqued. He greeted Castiel with a dazzling smile, his beautiful eyes brimming, and somehow just two minutes later they found themselves in a exhilarating discussion about Vonnegut. Castiel totally forgot about the line getting longer and longer behind the man, so captivated by their interaction that it took one of his employees nudging his shoulder and calling his name quite loudly to train his attention back to the situation at hand.

Castiel flushed fiercely as he noticed the approximately twenty pairs of eyes staring at him and mumbles a hasty apology. The gorgeous man, however, just chuckled amused, winked at him and whispered, “I'll see you around, _Castiel_.”

Castiel blinked a few times before his gaze flickered to the leather bracelet on the guy's left wrist that said _“SAM”_ in capital letters, rejoicing that destiny was making it easy for a change and was giving him that stunning man's name on a silver platter, before answering, “Until next time, _Sam_.”

He laughed, the sound so rich and beautiful that Castiel entirely missed what Sam said afterwards as he was waving and walking away.

For the rest of the morning Castiel was unable to concentrate on even the simplest tasks and eventually banned into the back office so he wouldn't destroy any equipment.

It only got worse when Sam showed up the next day.

And the day after that.

He indeed kept true to his words.

Every single morning, right before work, he drops by the bakery, distracting Castiel with his _everything_ to a point of no return. Castiel finds himself knocking over cups and stumbling over his words and blushing more than he has ever blushed before in his entire life combined and it's the best part of his day.

So yes, when he eventually realizes, on that cloudy Thursday morning, that he might be a little bit smitten, he's not really surprised.

The more he learns about this man, the more besotted he becomes.

Sam is at least very keen to share. He always turns toward Castiel when he arrives, no matter who's standing behind the counter, and immediately begins to talk as though he wants to squeeze as much information (and learn even more) in their daily two-minute encounters.

He rambles about his job as a high school teacher, obviously highly fond of his kids although he tries to sound exasperated, about his friends and their weird hobbies (Castiel never knew what LARPing meant until now) and about anything else that comes to his mind. He's definitely a very interesting person to talk with – one week they're overly engrossed with J.K. Rowling and the political issues in her works before switching right back to Sam attempting to convince Castiel to share the recipe of his by now kind of famous pie (which apparently became the love of Sam's life, as he is always quick to explain).

More often than not Sam is accompanied by his brother, a mountain of a man with shaggy hair and a kind smile. Obviously they both have apartments close to each other right around to corner and they meet up almost every morning to pick up some breakfast and coffee before going to work. It seems to be some kind of ritual they both cherish and Castiel finds it rather sweet, to be honest.

It's obvious that Sam's fairly proud of his “little” genius and although he's keeping his praise to a minimum to not make his brother uncomfortable, Sam's face says it all.

Their tight bond gets especially clear by Dean wearing the same leather bracelet on his wrist as his brother, saying _“DEAN”_. Apparently it had been a joined gift by someone important to them both and they decided long ago to keep it close, every single day.

Sam gets a bit emotional when he mentions the story to Castiel one day. He tries to tame it, even laughs and waves it off as though it's an old tale no one should pay too much attention to, and obviously keeps it vague and brief on purpose, but there is a light in his eyes he just can't hide.

It's all very moving and Castiel almost envies them their devotion. He doesn't have a special person in his life that would share such a small yet meaningful gesture with him.

Sam is indeed a very lucky man.

“Nah, I wouldn't go that far,” Sam counters when Castiel tells him so. “A lot of shit happened too. But I guess all in all my life's quite alright so far.”

“Well, my brother would laugh at me if I'd propose matching bracelets,” Castiel explains with a smile, imagining Gabriel falling off a chair roaring with laughter.

“Well, my stupid Sasquatch over there,” he nods at Dean who's checking something on his phone, completely ignoring them, “he didn't have much of a choice, didn't he? When Bobby gave those wristbands to us, he couldn't just say 'no' and leave it with that.”

However, there's a waver in Sam's voice, making it crystal clear that there's much more to the story than he'd heard so far. But Castiel doesn't mean to pry, so he simply smiles gently and says, “You may not believe me, but you _are_ a lucky man.”

Sam studies him for a moment and eventually admits, “Maybe you're right. After all, a really awesome bakery just opened close to my place. I'd call that lucky indeed.”

Castiel chuckles. “If you say so.”

“And the nice owner is definitely a bonus, too.”

Sam freaking _winks_ at him after that and Castiel can't control a way too obvious blush to save his life.

He's absolutely screwed.

Sam, though, just stares at him as though seeing Castiel all flustered is the best thing that ever happened to him.

“Perhaps I'm indeed a _very_ lucky man.”

  
  


* * * * *

  
  


Life seems to be perfect for a change.

Castiel can't recall ever feeling so alive, so full of energy. Even the mere thought of seeing Sam, just for a few minutes, elates him in a way he never imagined.

And then, _of course_ , everything goes to hell.

It starts when Jo places a cake order on a rainy Friday afternoon.

She's a friend of Sam and Dean's that had been dragged in by Sam one day and instantly returned the next one on her own account for “another round of those criminally delicious cinnamon rolls”. Since then she shows up regularly and always finds time to chat easily with Castiel for a moment.

“It needs to be a big cake,” she emphasizes. “Chocolate. _Lots_ of chocolate.”

Castiel's lips curl upward. “I assume it's a special occasion?”

Jo nods enthusiastically. “Engagement,” she announces. “Sam _finally_ popped the question. Took the moron long enough, in my opinion.”

Castiel freezes at those words and he simply gapes at Jo, desperately trying to find some coherent speech in his head. “Sam?” he eventually croaks.

He must have misheard, right?

Because there's _no way_ that Sam would never have mentioned a significant other. That's usually something people tell each other, even if their meetings are fairly brief. At least when that specific partner important enough to marry them.

However, Jo crushes his hope just a moment later. “Yep,” she confirms, nodding enthusiastically and being rather oblivious to Castiel's shock. “Sam and Eileen are dating since the dawn of time. They're _ridiculously_ cute together.” She looks up. “I guess you haven't met her yet?”

Castiel merely shakes his head, not trusting his voice.

Before his inner eye he sees freckles and a blinding smile and instead of the familiar joy Castiel feels a huge wave of disappointment.

Granted, he never got his hopes up in the first place because life can be cruel and unfair, but particularly in the last week he actually got the impression that Sam's interest in him wasn't purely platonic. Castiel isn't an expert on flirting and wooing, far from it, but according to his employees Hannah and Alfie Sam has been becoming less and less subtle for some time now. They both had assured Castiel that Sam's flirting game was strong.

But now …?

Apparently they all had been majorly wrong.

Castiel feels his heart plummet and it takes all his strength not to show it on the outside. Instead he forces a (probably very unconvincing) smile on his lips and says, “I'm glad to hear they're happy.”

“They sure as hell are,” Jo agrees, studying the pastries in the display intently and completely missing the waver in Castiel's voice. “Meant to be and all. Dean's thrilled too, you know. Excited to be the best man, that dork.”

She keeps on and on about the upcoming wedding and the beautiful couple, but everything is a blur to Castiel after that as he wallows quietly in his misery.

So much for the man of his dreams.

  
  


* * * * *

  
  


Sam shows up the next morning, right on schedule.

He beams brightly at Castiel, glowing like someone who has everything he ever wanted in his life, and Castiel can't even keep feeling sorry for himself when seeing Sam so gleeful.

He deserves all the happiness.

Even if that means that it will take a bit longer until Castiel finds his.

“Hey, Cas,” Sam says cheerfully. He started to use the shortened version of Castiel's name a while ago and Castiel found himself liking it, especially hearing it out of Sam's mouth. He's got a specific way of pronouncing his name that makes Castiel shiver all over.

“Hello, Sam,” Castiel greets politely.

Sam laughs. “That never gets old, man.”

Castiel isn't exactly sure what he's referring to, but he refrains from asking. A lot of Sam's references are going straight over his head.

“I heard about the engagement,” he says instead, being fairly proud of himself for sounding somewhat mature and calm. “It's excellent news.”

“It's great, right?” Sam grins broadly. “I mean, it's long overdue, to be honest. And Eileen's seriously awesome, she's gonna be a perfect addition to our family.” He cocks his head to one side. “Okay, technically she's been part of the family for years, but now it'll be official. On paper and stuff.”

He indeed sounds overly excited and Castiel's heart melts at the sight.

“That's good,” he mutters. His chest constricts unpleasantly, his body apparently highly displeased with Castiel shoving down all his emotions rather violently, but at the same time watching Sam's beautiful smile radiating like this is the most amazing thing ever.

All in all it's very confusing.

“So … um, do you maybe have a minute?” Sam wonders, glancing at the short line of customers nearby that is currently served by Hannah. “If you're not too busy or something, of course …”

Castiel can't exactly be sure due to the bright light, but it seems like Sam's cheeks are tinging pink.

“Uh, yes,” Castiel agrees. At first he considers declining because he isn't exactly sure whether he'd be able to keep his feelings at bay for long in the man's presence, but Sam's stunning green eyes obviously have the power to make him throw caution to the wind. “I can spare a minute or two.”

“Great,” Sam answers, but he sounds surprisingly nervous all of a sudden. “There … well, there is something I wanted to ask you.”

Castiel steps a bit to the right so they would have a little bit of privacy. “What is it?”

Sam licks his lips, his gaze dropping to his feet. “Um … there's a movie festival this weekend. Not sure if you've heard of it. Lots of classics and stuff.” He takes a deep breath. “And I wonder if you wanna go there. Maybe. With … with me.”

Castiel raises his brows in confusion. That almost sounds like a date.

It actually sounds _quite definitely_ like date.

For one, beautiful moment Castiel believes that he got it all wrong, that he misinterpreted Jo's words as much as Sam's and that there's an absolute logical explanation for all of this, that he's free to go to this festival with Sam, enjoy their joined time and perhaps kiss him when the night is over …

It seems wonderful.

And yet again, it's just a dream. Because he _didn't_ misunderstand anything! There is no denying it – Sam is marrying someone named Eileen, obviously his girlfriend of many years now, and there is no place for a pining baker in between.

Sam obviously just wants to be nice. It's apparent he's enjoying his little talks with Castiel every morning and he's keen to turn this into a real friendship.

And it's sweet and thoughtful and Castiel finds himself recoiling.

He's not sure if he's ready for that yet. Yes, he would love to be friends with Sam because he's kind and funny and just the type of person everyone wants to have in their lives, one way or another, but Castiel knows that he has to get over this whole mess first before being able to accept Sam's offer.

Otherwise it would break his heart.

“Thank you for thinking of me,” Castiel says, his following smile not reaching his eyes. “But I'm afraid I have no time at the moment. Building a new business … it's …” He heaves a breath, feeling every single cell in his body protesting. “Maybe another time.”

Sam's expression slips for a split second, morphing into something so _crestfallen_ that Castiel finds himself on the verge to take it all back immediately, his own emotions be damned, but just then Sam schools his features back and clears his throat.

“It's, uh, it's cool, man,” he shrugs it off, a watery smile on his lips. “I imagine it being very … time-consuming and stuff. Another time then.”

Castiel instantly wants to assure Sam that he's a wonderful man and he'd love to spend more time with him, that everyone should be lucky who considers him a friend – he wants to do about _everything_ to never see that look on his face ever again –, but just as he opens his mouth, eager to let Sam know, Sam mumbles a quick “Bye” and walks out of the door before anyone's able to stop him.

  
  


* * * * *

  
  


After that their brief encounters turn quite stilted.

Sam still smiles at him as he ignores the other employees to get his order straight from Castiel, but it seems stiff like it takes all kinds of effort to maintain it. He offers a few anecdotes of his life, asks Castiel a few questions in return, though it's not the same anymore. There are no carefree laughs, no casual touches, no lingering looks. Instead he avoids Castiel's gaze more often than not before hastily saying his goodbyes and actually fleeing the bakery.

It's clear as crystal that he'd rather be anywhere else and only keeps up pretenses out of politeness.

Just a few days later he doesn't show his face at all anymore. It's only his brother Dean who walks in and orders some pastries and two coffees, making it fairly obvious that Sam isn't far behind, but doesn't want to interact with Castiel.

It stays that way for about a week.

Dean always stares at him as though he's desperate to say something, to meddle, and part of Castiel actually hopes he would really do so because he's _dying_ to make things right again somehow and he's got no idea how to even start, but in the end Dean just keeps quiet on the matter.

It only changes when one day Dean shows up in the company of a young woman.

Dean and her have a short, apparently rather heated discussion in sign language, making it obvious that she's probably deaf or at least hearing-impaired, before she eventually focuses her gaze on Castiel and stride towards him, looking frighteningly determined.

“You're Castiel?” she asks and it almost sounds like a challenge.

Castiel figures that it's most likely not a wise move to cross this woman as he nods timidly.

“Eileen,” Dean pipes in, exasperated as he gets himself into her line of sight so she's able to see his lips movements. “We really shouldn't –”

“We _really_ should,” she counters. “I'm sick of all the miserable moping.”

“Eileen,” Dean says once again, rubbing his face.

Meanwhile, Castiel fixes his eyes on Sam's fiancée. The whole time he wondered how she would be like and now he has to admit she's everything he imagined her to be. Beautiful and fierce and obviously not willing to take anyone's shit.

No wonder Sam is so excited to make her part of their family.

“I normally don't like to get involved,” Eileen states, her hard gaze focusing on Castiel. “I think that people should be capable of dealing with their own stuff. But that stupid moron is my future brother-in-law and somehow I care for him.”

Castiel furrows his brows, a bit puzzled by her choice of words, but before he's able to ask Dean leans forward and, after some encouragement by Eileen, wonders, “Why did you turn my brother down?”

Castiel finds himself speechless all of a sudden, just staring at those piercing pairs of eyes looking back at him.

“It's just … I've been here, all these weeks,” Dean continues. “You probably totally forgot that I even existed, but damn, I've seen it all. And I _know_ you like that idiot. When he told me that he wanted to ask you out, I was _so sure_ you would say yes.” He halts, sighing. “But then you didn't. And my brother was frigging devastated.”

Castiel always wondered how it would feel like to have his heart ripped out his chest.

Now he knows.

“I'm – I'm so sorry –”

“We didn't come here to accuse you,” Eileen is quick to add after glaring at Dean, most likely for his choice of words. “And we didn't come here to convince you to change your mind or something. We're fairly sure you had your reasons for saying no and we respect that. We don't wanna push you into anything you might regret only because you feel bad.”

“Yeah, right,” Dean agrees. “Sorry for making you think that. I seriously didn't wanna blame you or something. It's your decision after all.” He shuts his eyes for a moment, obviously collecting his thoughts. “But, you know, my idiot of a brother … he's got some bad experiences in the past and asking you out was a big step for him. And now he's telling himself that this all has been in his head. That he wanted it so bad he imagined you liking him. He's beating himself up over that and I just …”

“You care about him, that's fairly obvious,” Eileen cuts in, appearing like a woman who knows exactly what love looks like.

And Castiel flushes because this is _Sam's fiancée_ after all.

“Please just tell him that,” Eileen pleads. “You don't have to take him up on his offer or even date him, but right now he thinks he made the whole thing up in his mind and I can't have seeing him that miserable. I kinda love him, you know?”

Yes, Castiel knows quite well.

And he's actually really grateful for that. Eileen seems to care about Sam's well-being a great deal. He deserves someone so special in his life.

“I … I don't want him to feel bad,” Castiel eventually says. “I'm really sorry. I didn't mean –”

“We know,” Dean interrupts, a soft smile on his lips. “Misunderstandings like that happen all the time. Deep down he probably knows that as well. He'd probably get over himself soon enough and realize that you like him just fine, but well, it's actually a time for celebration right now and I wanna see him happy again.”

Castiel nods. “I understand. I never meant to dampen your wedding mood.”

Eileen shrugs, smirking. “It's quite alright. You're cute. I can see why Dean took a shot asking you out on a date. I'd probably done the same.”

Dean snorts next to her. “Thank you, love.”

She pats his broad chest. “You're still my number one.”

Dean looks at her in way Castiel can only call besotted and he grows very bewildered very fast.

“I … I don't understand,” he stutters, glancing back and forth between them. Just now he notices that they're fingers are linked, probably since the moment they approached Castiel at the counter.

“What is it?” Eileen wonders.

“Jo …” Castiel's head is spinning. “She … she told me that you and Sam are getting married.”

Eileen nods. “And that's right.”

“So why …?” He looks at their joined hands and the way they standing far too close to each other and his confusion grows stronger and stronger.

He's totally missing something here.

Something fundamental.

And suddenly Eileen's eyes widen in realization. “ _Oh my God_!” she exclaims. “I know that look!”

Dean flinches at her sudden outburst and stares at her in confusion. “What do you mean? What's happening?”

Just a moment later he receives a rather hard slap on his shoulder by Eileen. “Those stupid wristbands!” she says accusingly, pointing at the leather bracelet. “You're confusing people _again_.”

Dean wrinkles his giant forehead. “What?”

“Remember the first time we met?” Eileen asks. “And our date more or less right after that? The whole night I believed your name to be _DEAN_!”

Dean still seems highly puzzled by the events. “What does that have to do –?”

“I probably looked the same way Castiel is doing right now!” Eileen interrupts. “Super confused when you eventually told me stories about your brother _Dean_!”

Castiel is officially lost now. He has not a single clue what's going on.

“I don't understand …” he says once again, his voice shy now. He feels a headache coming his way as he attempts to entangle this cluster of confusing new information.

Dean, however, does finally seem able to catch on. His jaw goes slack as he looks at Eileen in shock.

“Oh no,” he whispers, shaking his head as if he can't believe it. “You're not saying …?”

Eileen nods determinedly. “I think so.”

Dean still doesn't appear convinced. He abruptly turns toward Castiel and asks urgently, “You do know that _I_ am Sam, right?”

What?

“ _What_?”

Castiel merely gapes, even incapable of blinking.

_Now_ he's _absolutely_ certain that he misheard.

Meanwhile, Eileen slams her palm onto the counter, making several of the patrons close by flinch in surprise, and bellows triumphantly, “ _I knew it_!”

Dean – or Sam? – groans as he rubs his face. “Seriously? I can't believe that. All that moping and pining – for _nothing_?”

Castiel glances back and forth between them as they switch back to sign language, moving their hands way too fast for Castiel's limited skills he got himself in a ASL class years ago to understand. It's clear, however, that Eileen isn't happy with Sam's phrasing and wants to give him a piece of her mind.

And _damn_ , is his name seriously Sam?

So does that mean …?

“Okay, what is going on?” Castiel cuts into their domestic dispute. “Can _please_ someone explain?”

Eileen's expression is full of sympathy as she looks back at him. “It's actually a sweet story.”

And then she nudges the man beside her to continue.

Sam clears his throat – and God, his name is honestly _Sam_ , right? – and raises his left arm so that the wristband is visible. “That's a gift from our friend Bobby. He's like a father to us since our own dad … well, he wasn't exactly a role model, y'know?” He halts briefly, making it obvious that this is still an emotional subject for him. “I don't remember exactly when Bobby gave it to us, to be honest. I think I was around fourteen at the time. I recall having a tough time in school back then, it wasn't really easy for a gangly teenager like me. And when Bobby gave us those bracelets on Christmas Day … well, Dean proposed to switch them. So I'd carry his name and he mine. And everytime someone would bother me, I'd have something to remind me that my big brother was with me.”

Well, Castiel has to agree with Eileen, this is definitely a very sweet story.

“There aren't any bullies annoying me anymore, but somehow I still kept Dean's name with me,” Sam explains. “And Dean never suggested to switch them back at some point in the past either. So it stayed that way.”

Castiel needs a moment to wrap his head around this new information. It sounds way too good to be true and for a second he wonders whether his mind is playing some tricks.

“But … I called you 'Dean' several times,” Castiel remembers eventually. “And your brother … if I was using the wrong names, why didn't you correct me right away?”

Sam looks sheepish. “We're just used to it, y'know? Friends and family and whatnot – they still think it hilarious to use the wrong names occasionally. Dean and I stopped going with it a long time ago. And somewhere along the way we kinda got used to react to both names.”

At first Castiel wants to argue that this doesn't explain why his brother obviously didn't figure it necessary to introduce himself properly to a stranger nonetheless, but then he brings their first meeting back to mind. How Castiel called him 'Sam' after spotting the wristband and how this gorgeous, stunning man said something in return which Castiel absolutely missed because he's been so blinded by the dazzling smile that his whole system shut down.

Obviously he'd been so dumbstruck he completely forgot to listen.

“So that means you are …?”

“Sam Winchester,” he answers with a wide grin. “Happiest man alive because he's engaged to this beautiful woman next to me!”

He drops a soft kiss onto Eileen's cheek which makes her chuckle and blush a little bit.

For an instant Castiel can't help thinking that they're most likely the cutest couple he's ever seen and he finds himself smiling warmly at their open affection, but just a moment later he recalls the urgent issue at hand.

“So your brother …?”

“Dean Winchester!” Sam practically beams now, sounding overly excited. “Totally single and _really crazy_ about this guy who opened a bakery around the corner from where we live.”

Castiel feels heat crawling up his neck as both Sam and Eileen stare at him gleefully. “So the other day … when he asked me to that festival,” Castiel bites his bottom lips as everything slowly starts to fit together, “... he was asking me out? On a _date_?”

Sam and Eileen nod in unison.

“And I rejected him,” Castiel realizes. His heart drops as he recalls Dean's deeply disappointed face after Castiel declined his offer.

“And now I get why,” Sam says. “Knowing my brother he probably didn't use the word 'date' directly, am I right? I guess you thought he meant some kind of buddy night or whatever. And I can see how that didn't really appeal to you considering … well, considering they way you two always look at each other.”

He sounds teasing now. Fond.

And Castiel downright ignores it when he urges, “Where is Dean now?”

It feels _right_ saying the name. As if a floodgate opened up and showed him a whole new world behind it.

And it fits so much better than _'Sam'_. Castiel always kind of thought that, but he never understood why.

Now he wonders whether his subconsciousness somehow knew the whole time that something was wrong.

“Dean's outside,” Sam jerks him out of his thoughts. “Waiting in the car.”

Castiel instantly rushes towards the door, but as he pushes it open he finds himself halting for a moment and announcing, “Congratulations on the engagement, by the way!”, before he continues in his mission, followed by Sam and Eileen's happy laughter.

Castiel spots the black Impala on the next parking lot right away. Dean told him so much about the car before that he probably would have been able to recognize it anywhere.

Castiel hastens over and notices Dean sitting behind the wheel, checking something on his phone and being completely oblivious to his surroundings. When Castiel knocks impatiently against the window, he startles hard and almost drops the device in his hands.

“Cas?” Dean asks, his voice muffled through the closed door. He stares at the man in utter surprise and for a minute even seems to forget that he's supposed to react somehow. Eventually though he remembers to open the door and climbs out of the car, his gaze never leaving Castiel.

“Your name is Dean!” Castiel blurts right into his face, feeling like a clumsy oaf but not giving a damn.

Because here he is – gorgeous, wonderful _Dean_ – and Castiel can't help beaming at him, probably looking like a lunatic in the process.

Dean blinks a few times, clearly dumbstruck. “Um … yes?”

“ _Your. Name. is. Dean._ ” Castiel emphasizes every single word, sensing an elation running through his body he never felt before.

“Um, you're okay, Cas?” Dean asks, obviously concerned that Castiel lost his mind somewhere along the way. He even squeezes Castiel's wrist gently and studies him from top to bottom as though looking for clues for the other man's seemingly irrational behavior.

“I'm fine,” Castiel promises, grinning brightly. “I'm _more_ than fine.”

Dean instinctively steps back a bit, most likely somewhat intimidated by Castiel's toothy grimace. “Uh … that's great?”

“Can I kiss you?” Castiel finds himself asking all of a sudden. He's fairly surprised by his own boldness, but can't bring himself to regret it.

Especially when he witnesses Dean's cheeks turning beet red immediately. “W-what?”

Castiel takes Dean's hand and brushes over that damned wristband which caused so much confusion. “I thought your name is Sam.”

Dean stares at him for a moment, apparently unsure what to say or what even to think about this weird situation. In the end he goes with, “ _What_?”

“I've read the name on the bracelet,” Castiel explains. “And I assumed it's your name.”

Dean's eyes widen as he tries to wrap his mind around the other man's words. “But … but I told you then,” he counters. “That first time we met. You – you called me 'Sam' and I corrected you. Remember?”

Castiel chuckles softly. “No,” he confesses. “After you smiled at me, my brain stopped working. I can't recall anything you said.”

Dean hesitates. “Really?”

There is a small speck of hope glimmering in his eyes and it's the most beautiful thing.

“You have quite the effect on me, _Dean_ ,” Castiel admits. “Something like that never happened to me before. But you … you seem to be the exception.”

Dean still seems to have some trouble handling the situation. “So … so every time you called me 'Sam', you weren't actually joking?”

Castiel shakes his head. “No, I wasn't.”

Dean huffs a breathy laugh. “Well, I've gotta say, I really found it a bit strange after the _fifth_ time, but –” He licks his lips anxiously. “So when you heard about the engagement …?”

Castiel nods. “I thought _you_ were the one getting married,” he confirms. “I was seriously crushed when Jo told me about that.”

“You were, huh?”

“I mean, of course I was also happy for you or at least trying to be,” he continues, realizing he's babbling now, but unable to stop it. “Because you deserve all the happiness in the world and Jo told me that you and Eileen are the cutest couple. I mean, that _Sam_ and Eileen are the cutest couple –”

Dean still seems to be a bit overwhelmed by the whole thing, but he chuckles anyway. “They _are_ kinda gross.”

“And when you asked me to that festival … well, I figured you wanted to be friends,” Castiel rambles on. “ _Just_ friends. And I don't want to your friend.” He flinches instantly as he notices how that sounds. “I mean, _of course_ I want to be your friend. Friendship is the most important basis for any kind of valuable relationship. But … at that point I merely had to get used to the idea of you being a soon-to-be-married man –“ He sighs. “It would have been too much to go to this festival with you, knowing there would be _nothing else_ between us. Nothing else than friendship. So I said 'no' to protect my own, stupid heart. But I had no idea it would hurt you like that, I never meant –”

“It's okay,” Dean cuts in. “I guess … I see the bigger picture now.” He shakes his head in disbelief. “Damn, Sammy told me the same thing happened with Eileen back then. Maybe we should really get rid off those dumb things, they're nothing but trouble.”

He glares at the wristband accusingly.

Castiel, however, lays his hand above it. “Please don't,” he says warmly. “It's a very sweet gesture.”

Dean smiles in response, his features so soft that Castiel can't help tracing them tenderly with his finger. Once again he seriously astounded by his own forwardness, but Dean leans into the touch straightaway, as if this is everything he has been waiting for.

And maybe it kinda is.

“You didn't answer my question,” Castiel whispers.

Dean's lips curl upwards. “The one about the kiss?”

“Yes.”

Instead of answering Dean's arms suddenly wrap around Castiel's waist and pull the other man closer. Castiel merely has time to make a sound that's part surprise and part approval before pliant lips cover his own and he finds himself in a world of _bliss_.

Castiel never knew that a kiss could feel this way. Dean's touch is soft and unhurried, yet so full of emotions. Castiel's toe curl inwards as he gives back as good as he's got and hopes that this would never end.

But of course eventually they have to pull back to get some air, though they don't go very far. Their noses are still touching and Castiel revels in the sight of Dean so radiant with joy.

“So …” Castiel chews his lower lip, feeling extremely pleased when Dean's eyes follow the motion with interest. “I guess that festival was a one weekend thing, right? But how about something else? A nice movie, some dinner?”

“ _Yes_!” Dean agrees immediately. “Sometime soon.”

“Tonight?”

Dean chuckles amused. “It's gonna be torture to wait that long, but I'll have to manage somehow.”

Castiel can't do anything else but kiss the beautiful smile once more.

“Sorry for being so stupid,” he mumbles against Dean's skin. “I just should have _listened_.” He shakes his head in the face of his own foolishness. “I'm usually such a good listener. But _you_ … you just make me –”

He groans in frustration and presses his forehead against Dean's temple. “I'm really sorry.”

Dean drags him closer. “I get it, Cas. I'm just so adorable I'm frying brains left and right.” He laughs quietly, his whole body shaking. “Though I'm really glad you listened _now_.”

“Me too,” Castiel agrees. “And you have Eileen to thank for that.”

Dean makes a humming noise. “That woman is way too good for my brother. He's one lucky bastard.”

Castiel nods. “He is.”

Dean keeps silent for a while after that, his fingers gently brushing over Castiel's spine and making him shiver in the process. It's easy, quiet and it feels so comfortable that Castiel barely knows what to do with himself. Something like that never happened to him before.

“But you know what?” Dean eventually picks up his voice again.

“What?”

Dean grins brightly. “I'm starting to think that I'm one lucky bastard myself now.”

Something warm presses within Castiel's chest as he smiles harder than he ever smiled before in his life. “I told you that _weeks_ ago.”

Dean just laughs. “Yeah, you did. If you want you can tell me that every single day from now on.”

It sounds like a promise for a beautiful future, a future filled with happiness and so much potential, and Castiel simply nods and buries his face in Dean's neck, almost overwhelmed by all these feelings.

It seems wonderful and terrifying at the same time.

And Castiel can't wait to have it all.

 

**Author's Note:**

> You've got no idea how hard it's been to use the wrong names most of the time ;DD
> 
> By the way, the story is loosely inspired by my own life. Granted, my sister and I didn't wear any bracelets, but we looked very much alike and back in school we've got mixed up _constantly_ , especially by some of our teachers ;p At some point we got tired of correcting people all the time and started to react to each other's names as well xDD  
> To this day you can either address me as "Sarah" (my actual name) or "Rebecca" (my sister's name), I'll definitely react to both ;p


End file.
